Bad Morning

I’m not in a good mood. I’m filling in for someone else so I’m away from my desk for the third day in a row. Then I took the elevator to go down from the 10th floor. Instead of hitting the “lobby” button I accidently hit the “detach cable” button so my elevator did a free-fall and plummeted from the 10th floor all the way to the basement. It was smashed to smithereens and now everybody’s all pissed at me because we now only have one working elevator but hey I’m the one who’s been pulling elevator shards from my clothes all morning so FUCK YOU!!

The good news is my son is still around. Kim’s diabolical plan to send him to juvie didn’t work because when she tried to drop him off there they said they couldn’t take him because duh he hadn’t committed a crime. So he’s still at Eastern but as she told me one time “If I wanted to play him bogue I could pull him out of Eastern and send him to Sexton. Those niggas don’t play there and they will KICK HIS ASS!

She’s big on the ass kicking motif. Now she’s threatening to bring her brother Ricky up from Atlanta to kick his ass. Every story ends like that but she’s only doing it for his own good she says. Because if she doesn’t instill it in him now he’s not going to know how the world works and he won’t be prepared (when you don’t understand how the world works there seem to be ass kickings around every corner). “If he doesn’t learn now then he won’t know how to act and the only thing he will be qualified for will be to be in the Peace Corps and they will send him to help the starving people in Somalia and when he gets there the starving kids will KICK HIS ASS!!!

Sigh.

I have to hurry up and post this while I have the chance. It’s busy today.

12 Responses to “Bad Morning”

  1. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    I should come up there and kick his a$$.

  2. Mexigogue says:

    Good. That will give him the practice for when he has to fight Starvin’ Marvin.

  3. Linny says:

    hmmmm…. a detatch cable button… cool

    as far as the ass kicking scenario…

    I don’t understand how the world works and yet, ironically, I’ve yet to experience an ass kicking… of course I’m a girl and we tend to get bitch slapped rather than ass kicked so that might be the reason…

    with any luck, she will send your son to the other school, he’ll learn to speak fluent ass kick from the ‘bruthas’, she’ll invite her lame ass kickin’ brother up from atlanta and your son will don a pair of size 13’s from K-mart (don’t want to dirty up the good ones) and commence to performing a proper ass kicking… you know… just to show his mom that he’ll be okay in the big world.

  4. Della Reese says:

    Ohhhhhhh, so you like to hit people with garbage pails!

  5. R says:

    You’ve gotta be a true noob to get beat up by starving Somalians.

  6. Rae says:

    The Peace Corps won’t take someone nowadays unless you have a college degree.

  7. Mexigogue says:

    College degree?? How many asses do you gotta kick to get one of those?

  8. Linny says:

    hmmm… lets see… 1 professor per class, 3 classes per semester… 3 semesters a year… 5 years (come on, who can graduate in 4?)

    that makes…

    damn…

    I hate math!!!

  9. Phelps says:

    The best part is when Mexi tried the sympathy card. “You actually want him arrested? Do you know that’s like? Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?”

    And she said, “no, but I’ve been swung around by the tits a couple of times.”

  10. HMT says:

    Starving Somalians are good for one thing – starving and providing celebrities with sufficient soapboxes.

    the world needs ditch diggers!

  11. Northe says:

    I love our society nowadays. Its the best when back in our parents day they used to try discipline and guidance. The mark of a typical nowadays says I need to bring someone in to kick his ass. My daughter’s mother being one of those types of people. I love the brow furrowing she displays everytime my daughter comes to me to talk or when she has a problem.

    Try parenting, it works. Tell her Mexi, tell her.