Throwing Stuff

I had some really good notes written out for today’s blog but Rip Hamilton ripped them up. So I’m winging it.

Sorry for chopping Rachael’s head off yesterday Bri, you know how it is.

I was reading on an online list about how some fool kid hit Cosmic Siren’s car with an egg. It reminded me of stuff I did as a kid. Fade to memories, everything going squiggly and harp sounds.

When I was a teenager I hit a car with an egg. It wasn’t my fault, one of my idiot friends made me do it. Afterwards I felt bad about it.

When I was about 10 I had a snowball. A car had driven past me and I was pretending to be Roger Staubach or Terry Bradshaw. Maybe Joe Ferguson. I threw the snowball in a high arc leading right to where the car was driving. Timed perfectly, the car driving away from me got hit dead center of the windshield right in the driver’s vision. I turned and ran. I didn’t feel bad about that one. I felt pretty good about the throw. Still do.

Damn. Now I wanna go throw stuff.

17 Responses to “Throwing Stuff”

  1. Phelps says:

    One time, my brother and the hooligan from down the street (they were both about eight or nine) were out playing the front yard. I was inside reading. I hear a knock on the door, and my father starts talking to someone, followed by my brother getting a beating.

    Turns out that they were in the front yard, squirting cars with the water hose as they went by the house. Until they squirted a car that had the windows down. The lady driving stopped. She brought them both up to the front door. (This is back when you could make idiot kids account for what they had done without having to register as a sex offender.) I’m pretty sure that the hooligan from down the street got a beating too, which is fitting since I’m 90% sure it was his idea.

  2. guy in the UNLV Jacket says:

    dirka dirka?

  3. Mexigogue says:

    When we lived on 910 Johnson when I was about 11 there was this tree in the yard that would grow these little evil green apples. They were too hard and sour to eat but just right for throwing at cars. If any adult had stopped and caught me greenhanded I would have used the old standard “It wasn’t me!”

    We also went into the neighbor’s garage and found porno. I was like ewwwww, naked chicks from the 1970s! Shave that stuff!

  4. rae says:

    You apologize to MY MAN but not to me??? I see how you are.

  5. Mexigogue says:

    haha, sorry rae!

  6. guy in the UNLV Jacket says:

    Johnson st? Man that’s in the ghetto cholo!

  7. Phelps says:

    Well, Rae, it’s like this, he’s already done his penance since he’s with you, but you haven’t repented for shit.

  8. Mexigogue says:

    snicker!

  9. rae says:

    Phelpsie!!! I can’t believe you are on the bandwagon too??

    For the record-my penance was the 8 years Brian and I were seperated. Now that we’re back together I count every day as a blessing.

    *Cue the puking and rolling of eyes*

    Pbbbbt!!

  10. Mexigogue says:

    Hahaha, I’m laughing my eyes raw! I’m sorry Rae, it seems as though I’ve turned Rae-bashing into a national pastime. It’s all in good fun though we think you’re swell!

  11. ONE ANGRY MAN says:

    Okay now I am confused. * years you were away??? See this is why I don’t watch soap operas.

    Anyway, we used to spread fishing line across the street at night and let cars run into it. It was funny as hell because usually they were drunk on their way back fromthe bar. So they did not know what happened. They just had no radio reception in the morning. I love the “D”.

    We also shot bottle rockets through the mail boxes (attached to front door) at the mean nosey people in the neighborhood. Especially the ones that would not let us pick the fresh fruit off their trees in the backyard. BITCHES!!!!!

  12. Mexigogue says:

    And you got so mad your blood boiled to a point that changed your body’s chemical composition, you mutated, and thus was born the insidious super-powered VEGETABLE VENDOR ROBBING MAN!!

  13. R says:

    One time at a friend’s birthday party, we were like ten or eleven at the time, a kid threw a slice of pizza at a passing car. I’m pretty sure it hit the passenger side window but don’t quote me on that cuz I was hauling ass with everyone else into the woods.

    Ah, youth.

  14. Mexigogue says:

    We told my cousin the backyard was haunted. He didn’t believe me. I led him to a spot in the back yard where he was standing on a sheet of wood. The wood covered a hole. My brother was in the hole with a plastic bucket. He said into the bucket (with an eerie echo) “Get off my dead body!” My cousin ran and screamed. I laughed all my skin off!

  15. rae says:

    Angry dude- Soap Opera recap:

    Brian and I were high school sweethearts. Dated for 4 years. He went into the Air Force but before leaving proposed to me. I accepted. Then I dove into La La Land (Drugs) and broke up with him. He married someone else and I married (twice) and then after an 8 year separation he called me. Our divorces were final two weeks apart and I quit my job and moved from the east coast to the west coast to be with him.

    And they lived happily ever after…….or did they? Find out next time on *insert witty soap opera name*.

  16. HMT says:

    vandalism on cars eh?

    well, this one time this chick wanted my bone, but she was so annoying and ugly… so I walked up on her hood and pissed on her winshield.

    She ended up key’n my truck but in the end I think I win.

  17. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    HMT: 100
    ugly Skank: 15