The Young and the Restless

Rachael sends me an e-mail this morning that says “Post dammit, I’m bored!”

Ok, number one: who died and made me the entertainment monkey? And number two, y’all don’t need me. You’ve got your very own soap opera cast right here. You’ve got:

UNLV who is like Jack Abbot from Young and the Restless with the crass and inflammatory remarks that get people riled up. One of my favorite Jack Abbot lines: “I never wanted that child, I don’t want anything to do with that child, and if you send him to me in the summer I’ll send him right back!” And you have;

Rachael who is kind of like Nina because. .. heh heh! Nothin’!

And I’m like Philip who was married to Nina but died in a drunk driving accident (FYI this was back in ’80s.)

Since Lauri doesn’t post anymore she’s kind of like Sheila who left Young and the Restless and went to Bold and the Beautiful where she got a job as a lab tech so she could switch someone’s DNA sample but then the jackass security guard who had a crush on her idly spins the thing that holds the samples so they got mixed up.

Dave is kind of like Malcolm. Not because he was the black guy (ok, that did figure into it a little bit) but because Malcolm was hip to the streets but then moved to Jenowa City and started to have a life in the normal world. And then he ****ed his brother’s woman when she was high on medication and thought Malcolm was Neil and and Malcolm was like ok! Wait, that doesn’t sound like Dave. That sounds more like Damien. But he’s not on the blog.

I can’t remember any libertarian gun toting cowboys on Y and the Restless. So Phelps will have to be. .. . um. .. . Don Knotts. Ok that didn’t fit at all, but every show needs a Don Knotts to sort of. . . um. .. get things going.

Hey wait. . . .. How do I know all this soap opera shit?????

70 Responses to “The Young and the Restless”

  1. Amanda says:

    Dearheart, we need to widen your horizons.

    I’d say more, but I’m off to my pain and torture appointment – otherwise known as physical therapy.

  2. Mexigogue says:

    Dammit Amanda I couldn’t think of one for you. I was going to say Victoria Newman but to my knowledge your dad’s not a business Tycoon and you never announced your marriage to Ryan and had your dad summarily just punch Ryan in the gut. . . . or did you???

    I couldn’t think of one for IPUS either.

    Oh and TB gets to be the storm trooper! That should about cover it.

  3. rae says:

    Mikey- I do not nor have ever seen Y and R so I don’t know who Nina is or why you associated me with her- other than you said you were Phillip who was married to her and that’s the only way I’d be your wife. So spill it, is she Psycho, have big boobies, what’s the deal?

    And yes you are the entertainment monkey since no one gets interactive on my blog besides you and IPUS.

  4. Mexigogue says:

    I had to call my ex wife as a reference on this one. I remembered a devious chick who liked to get things going. Like when you called me and said “I’m at Ramon’s! Come over here and sing karaoke.” And I said “No, the only reason you’re there is to make Monique mad!” And you laughed and professed not to know what I was talking about but why would anybody in their right mind be at Ramon’s on Tuesday night for karaoke. That was great!

  5. rae says:

    Well, I never. I didn’t do that on purpose. Monique just happened to be there and I just happened to be there and I was thinking of you so I called and you came up there.

    So, what you’re saying is that I’m manipulative?

    How rude.

  6. Mexigogue says:

    NOBODY JUST HAPPENS TO BE AT RAMON’S ON TUESDAY NIGHT!!!!! NOBODY!!!!!! NOT EVEN THE OWNER!!!!

    and no, you’re not manipulative, you’re funny. And yes I’m rude (among other things, I know you can do better than that).

  7. ipus says:

    Entertainment monkey.. that is hilarious.

  8. rae says:

    I was in the neighborhood and needed a drink- i didn’t know they even had Karaoke.

    Stupid fat head.

  9. Mexigogue says:

    haha! stupid fat head! zingggggg!!!

    oh wait, she’s talking about me. DAMMIT!

  10. rae says:

    It is with the saddest heart that I must pass on the following news. Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

  11. Mexigogue says:

    (twitch twitch!) My stabbing hand’s getting itchy!

  12. ipus says:

    Oh man.. stab away!

    That is sooo cheesy rae..

  13. ipus says:

    …and I’m a poet..and don’t know it..

    hey, that’s cheesy too.. alright, I’ve said enough.

  14. rae says:

    IPUS- that was a post on your boy D-Ballz’s site and it came from your soon to be ex-mother-in-law. How funny is that????

  15. Mexigogue says:

    I will be down for approx 20 to 40 minutes. Upgrading memory. Any moron can do it in 10 minutes but I’m liable to electrocute myself even with the power source unplugged. I’m dumb like that. Wish me luck!

  16. Amanda says:

    When the light of day
    Comes out to play
    You will find me in your arms
    A willing captive of your charms
    With lips so ready to kiss
    The skin that brings me bliss
    A satin touch
    Which says so much
    Joins desire to desire
    Setting every sense to fire
    Until we burn in passion’s grip
    And lay together hip to hip
    Breathless and drained
    Energy depleted, but passion remains

  17. Amanda says:

    Thought I’d give y’all some real poetry.

    BTW, just make me Marlana from Days of Our Lives.

  18. ipus says:

    Rae, who da hell is DBallz?

  19. ipus says:

    and.. My soon-to-be-ex-mother-in-law is cheesy.

  20. Mexigogue says:

    A new low. I hurt my back working on my hard drive. I’m carried off the field to the boos of the fans. And I didn’t even suceed with the memory upgrade.

  21. rae says:

    D-ballz is your brother-in-law.

    Here is some poetry I like…

    “Roses are red, violets are blue, I’m a schizophrenic, and so am I.”

    –Howie Mandel and regurgatated by Andrew Dice Clay (before he was vulgar)

  22. Amanda says:

    Awwww…

    Poor Mexi! Do you need someone to ryub BenGay on that?

  23. rae says:

    Amanda- I don’t know you but after that “real poetry” jab, I would say you are more like Sammy on Days of Our Lives or Marlena when she was possessed and evil.

    Just an observation. 😉

  24. Amanda says:

    My…my…my…

    Aren’t we touchy? Tell me, do you take everything so personal?

  25. Mexigogue says:

    This chick wanted me to put whipped topping on her body and lick it off once. I took the whipped topping and said skip the middleman, I ate the whole thing right out the bucket! She went home mad and I watched cartoons.

    * the above is entirely fictional but my son reads the blog so hey!

  26. Mexigogue says:

    uh oh, here we go again. I’ll track the compubox numbers.

  27. rae says:

    Okay- Umm maybe you missed the part that said “Just and observation ;)”.

  28. Amanda says:

    BTW, it’s just an observation too. You seem to take everything I say as a personal attack.

    I reall hate to break it to you, but you’re not that important enough to waste my time like that. Just accept that I’m just an arrogant asshole like Mexi and Phelps. Only I’m not interested in your boobs.

  29. Mexigogue says:

    And just when Ghandi has taken a leave of absence.

  30. Amanda says:

    LOL!

    Lame tactic, my dear. If you can do observations, then so can I.

    If you can’t take your own medicine, then don’t dish it out 😀

  31. rae says:

    Hmm- I don’t recall commenting that much on things you say-but if you say so you arrogant asshole!! 🙂

    By the way- EVERYONE is interested in MY boobs. You just don’t know it yet.

  32. rae says:

    Lame Tactic? LMFAO Get over yourself.

    Hey Mexi- where is Ghandi these days anyway?

  33. Amanda says:

    Awww!

    You mean I can’t fun here too?

    Damn. Just when I thought I was going to have a good knock dow fight with that Chad-dude on the list, he goes quiet and now I don’t have anyone to rattle. *pout*

    Of course, I guess it is a bit too easy on here to get some people upset with me.

    Wusses 😉

  34. Mexigogue says:

    When my sister’s cats fight she sprays them with water.

  35. Amanda says:

    Post a pic, Rae.

    Talk is cheap. Whiskey costs money.

    (BTW, Mex, if these guys can’t handle me being the way I am on the list, let me know and I’ll back off. No point ruffling feathers that can’t be smoothed back down.)

  36. Mexigogue says:

    I’m like God. I don’t intervene.

  37. Amanda says:

    You people. Sheesh.

    It’s not a cat fight. Are you so threatened by women being assertive that you have to overreact to every little tiff?

    Guy have their cock fights all the time. You don’t see us gals running for cover and getting all worried and scared by it.

    Men are so over-reactive.

  38. rae says:

    First of all “Amanda”- I don’t go around posting myself all over the inernet. Second, the people on this Blog that “count” have seen my boobs. Third, I don’t have feathers because I am not a foul. And finally- whiskey may cost money for you, but when me and my boobs go to the bar- we don’t pay for it.

  39. Mexigogue says:

    Ok, cock fights just sounds gross.

  40. Amanda says:

    ROTFL!!!

    I love it when I get someone riled up over nothing.

    And Mexi, from our view, it’s often what it looks like 😉

  41. rae says:

    I love how much assumption goes into non-verbal communication. Just because I have superb “retorts” to your insults and attacks does not mean that I am riled up. I am just an excellent debater. So don’t flatter yourself honey, if I was riled up- you would KNOW because I would show up on your doorstep. 😉

  42. Amanda says:

    You are too funny!!!

    First you do snide comments over imagined insults and then you try to pretend that you’re just playing or don’t mean anything by them. Then you boast and then act like Miss Prissy when you’re called on them.

    God, this is too easy. You’re killing me over here.

    Anymore passive-aggressive tricks you want to play? Just remember that I have been called an Evil and Dangerous person on more than one occassion. It will take more than a little hissing and spitting to get through my fur. 😉

  43. Amanda says:

    Oh, yeah – I know I’m a antisocial bitch.

  44. Amanda says:

    Mex, are you sure you want me to continue, dude?

    You have to deal with these people in real life. I don’t.

  45. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    I am the good looking guy who pulls hot chicks!!

  46. Nice Rack says:

    Wow, I’m gone for a while and my boobs are replaced, lol. I hate to say this but Amanda is right. There are other things to discuss than boobs. At least when I talked about mine, I would throw in some intelligent conversation about the blog that day. No wonder I don’t chat on here anymore. It’s become nothing but a praise to rae’s boobs, and that includes her comments. I think I will go back to the Bold and the Beautiful.

  47. Amanda says:

    Nice to see you back, Rack.

  48. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Is it just me or does this whole upcoming presidental debate sound like a load of crap? The whole thing looks like it is going to be more scripted than the WWE.

  49. rae says:

    Amanda- assuming – “you do snide comments over imagined insults and then you try to pretend that you’re just playing or don’t mean anything by them. Then you boast and then act like Miss Prissy when you’re called on them” would be to assume my intonation, demeanor, personality, and dispostion. That is overanalyzing and presumptuous on your part. If you KNEW me- you’d know that when I have an opinion I state it and if you misinterpret it- I don’t give a shit. I really don’t have to prove myself to you or anyone. Are you really that bored that you continue to play into this “drama”.

    If people called me “an Evil and Dangerous person” I would be so proud too.

    I initially said you seemd like Sammy on Days– man was I right.

  50. Nice Rack says:

    Good to see you too Amanda, I thought that was a great poem. It’s got a flow along the lines of how I write, so it caught my attention. Have these guys really gone that titty crazy? I remember when there were actually discussions and debates on this thing.

  51. rae says:

    Aww “nice rack” …. NICE TRY!!

  52. Amanda says:

    Well, Rack. I don’t think they have gone that far actually, but what can I say – they haven’t been given much else to discuss, if you get my drift.

    I just thought I’d see what would happen if something really steamy was posted.

    What do you say? You post a few of your poems and I will post a couple with a geek twist on them? After all, I wouldn’t want to tarnish my rep. *wink*

  53. Nice Rack says:

    I will say this once “Rae”, I like you but don’t start with me. I’ve been looking over your comments for the past two weeks, and all you seem to focus on is yourself. From the connotation gotten from your comments, you seem very self-absorbed. If the conversation doesn’t revolve around you in some way, then it just isn’t fun for you. I used to write on here to support Mexi, and to have a moment of relaxation at work, not to boost my ego. If you want to go there, we can, but I don’t really want to argue with you. I have no desire, but if you want to make comments to me then I guess I’ll just have to go from there.

  54. Nice Rack says:

    Amanda, I’ll try to find some of my poems. I lost a lot of them when my computer crashed, and I unfortunately didn’t have any hard copies. My own fault, but I’ll see what I can come up with. Maybe we should be real geeks and start a literary blog. We could talk about poetry, lol. And of course put up those pictures from the booby wars, lol.

  55. rae says:

    Laurie- “nice rack” whatever your name is. If YOU have a problem with me being “self-absorbed” than that is YOUR problem not mine. I am flattered though that you are so interested in me that you have read my comments for the last two weeks!!

    A wise man once told me “When you become somebody the first thing you’ll get is haters. It’s like a backwards compliment.”

  56. Amanda says:

    heh!

    We could. I do have a website for my poetry and a live journal for my writings in progress. But since kids get sent to some of my sites, I don’t often post the real steamy stuff.

    I would have to use a different name – Amanda being my real name and all.

    How does “Silicon Babe” sound?

  57. Amanda says:

    BTW, the silicon would refer to being a computer geek, not the breasts.

    Hmmm… Maybe something else…

  58. Amanda says:

    So, Rae, does that mean that you actually liked my poem and that’s why you replied to it like you did?

    Of course, I’m already somebody.

  59. rae says:

    Umm no- Ipus made the comment of “…and I’m a poet..and don’t know it..” which was followed by your “innocent and non-self-absorbed look-at-me” comment of “Thought I’d give y’all some real poetry”

    …so I guess that means IPUS is somebody huh?

  60. Cosmic Siren says:

    I think I’ll go by Cosmic Siren, instead.

    Here’s one of my truly geeky soft porn poems:

    just imagining an atom
    pulsating slowly with power waves
    then increasing to the long-wave radio frequencies
    broadcasting its desire into the short-wave range
    until it is too steamy for television waves
    entering into microwaves
    before vibrating into heat waves

    next its photons jump a level
    to release the passionate energy of red
    then dancing throught the rest of the visual spectrum
    until finally the photons fling themselves free
    of the atomic restraints
    into the ultraviolet
    and the atom begins to disintergrate
    into revealing x-rays
    unleasing the gamma beast inside
    before soaring to comsic heights

  61. Cosmic Siren says:

    Never said he wasn’t someone.

    Why must someone be hated to be someone?

  62. Nice Rack says:

    I’ve never been a hater and I don’t plan to start. I think it’s sad that Mike has let you monopolize his blog, when it once held intellectual debates. Sure, we all had our days where we fucked around and the topics were anything but serious, but since I’ve been gone there hasn’t been much in the way of intelligent conversation. It isn’t your comments I was interested in, I wanted to see what had been going on with the boys. I enjoy when you come into Leroy’s because you have a good voice, I’m not Monique who couldn’t stand Mike having other friends, and I know it makes Mike happy to see you. I’ve never had any issues with you. I just wish you would realize that these guys are extremely intelligent, and they used to remember that. Boobies have unfortunately clouded their brains.

  63. Mexigogue says:

    For the love of god. I can’t leave this thing for a minute or all hell breaks loose.

  64. Nice Rack says:

    Amanda, remember when we had that bitch-war? The guys disappeared then, just like now. They really are scared when discussions between women start to heat up

  65. rae says:

    Amanda “IPUS” is a girl.

    Laurie – How Mike chooses to have his blog, his friendships, and discussions is HIS business since it is HIS blog. I already know these guys are intelligent – I don’t need a full-time Karaoke DJ at a dive bar to point that out to me. Oops, did I just go that far below the belt? My bad. No hard feelings “nice rack”.

  66. Mexigogue says:

    Maybe I’ll start a new posting.

  67. Cosmic Siren says:

    Yeah, I’ve noticed that, Rack.

    Women being assertive scares them, even when it’s something unimportant. You would think they thought we all had guns and were out of estrogen or something.

    Men can strongly disagree and it’s okay, but we’re supposed to be nice little ladies unless we’re making them hot for us.

  68. ipus says:

    Dang! Is all this fuss over my earlier poetry? I should be published!!!

  69. Cosmic Siren says:

    BTW, IPUS, my apologies on all accounts. I really wasn’t out to offend, but I’ve been writing poem for a long time and have even taught it and whenever I see the “poet and know it” bit, my evil side just has to come out.

  70. Mexigogue says:

    I’m about to kill this line of discussion, nobody get offended, it’s not geared to any person in particular. I’m about to start a new line in about 5 min.