In January 1993 I was working through a temp service and landed my first assignment with the State. I was assigned to the Michigan Insurance Bureau filling in for some administrative person who was on a medical leave. Since I had never worked in a State office before, the staff didn’t expect too much out of me so I spent my time picking up little bits of knowledge here and there and familiarizing myself with bureaucratic procedure.

The lady who was supposed to be showing me the ropes didn’t like me. In fact, creepy was the word she used to describe me on the day I came in wearing a black dress shirt with a black and white tie and black and white suspenders. That’s back when I wore dress clothes to work and my homies thought it was absolutely phat. They said I looked like Mexican Mafia. So I didn’t sweat what that lady thought.

There was one person I did pay attention to and that was this consultant (I don’t remember her title so I’ll just call her that) named Natalai. She was a black chick in the mostly white office who was older than me. I was 23 and she was about 37. She was real nice looking and friendly to boot so I spent a lot of time wandering toward her area when I’d come back from getting coffee. Of course since I was a temp and she was a professional type, she was making like at least three times as much as me but that didn’t bother me none. We got along just fine. We were both diehard Buffalo Bills fans so we always had something to talk about. I just didn’t know where the invisible line was though so I took care not to cross wherever it might be.

After my assignment ended there I worked elsewhere for a few months. I think there were two assigments in between but in the summer I was sent back to work in the Ottawa building where Natalai still worked on the third floor. I was now on the first floor with the Department of Natural Resources. My new coworkers didn’t like my creepy ass and didn’t like them none back so on break or at lunch I’d sometimes bump into Natalai and we’d talk some more. She was about the nicest person you’d ever want to meet.

At one point this guy in her office told her it was his birthday so she went over and gave him a big hug. It was a friendly hug but I was envyous. How can I be down. Later on as I’m talking to her on the phone I mention “After you gave (old dude) a hug I was about to lie and tell you it was my birthday too.”

Her voice comes back thick and sensous “Michael, are you hitting on me?”

“Uhhhhhhhhh. . . .. ” (in my defense I did not say “huh huh!” after that, I only thought it). Usually I can think quick enough on my feet to manage a response but at that moment I was speechless.

Towards the end of the day I was sitting there just thinking about her. I was totally digging this chick but I wasn’t sure if I was just imagining the whole thing or if there was really something there. Suddenly the phone rang. I had an eerie premonition and when I picked it up I heard her voice!

“What are you doing?”

“Oh my god!” I said. “I was just thinking about you!!”

“You were?” she said.

“Yeah! I was gonna call you. But then I said ‘fuck dat bitch’ so I didn’t call!”

Not the classiest thing to say but she laughed her head off. Whew! Now I’m thinking I gotta be more careful.

Later on after work she called me upstairs and we were browsing through the newspaper for some reason. She was on the movies page and she said “We should go see a movie.” That was female code for “Since you’re too much of a bitch to make the first move let me go ahead and make it.” I was like yessss!!!! I didn’t care what it was, we could have went to go see Pete’s Dragon, I was all in! So we went.

I don’t remember what movie it was, I don’t remember a damn thing about the ride except it was a sweet ass car. I think I was more in a daze than anything. Beautiful beautiful woman, nice ride, she’s intelligent as hell but the best was yet to come. We got back to her place.

I was on cloud nine, I think we had some food, everything was perfect. Then she drops the bomb of a question:

“Do you want to see the Buffalo Bills NFL record come from behind playoff victory when Jim Kelly got hurt and Frank Reich took over for him?”

I could have died. “Don’t fuck with me now. Do you really have it on tape?”

“Yes” she smiled.

The rest of the night was a blur. I was close to tears. I actually had been taping that game as it happened that year before but when the Bills fell back to such a margin that no NFL team had ever recovered from in a playoff game I turned the tape off in disgust and stopped watching. I had kicked myself ever since because it was just then that the turnaround happened. I never thought I’d see the end of that game. And I did that night. It was the best of my life.

Oh and I scored too. I wasn’t gonna leave that out.

65 Responses to “Natalai”

  1. rae says:

    You dirty Whore!!

  2. Mexigogue says:

    But I have a clean baby!

  3. rae says:

    How did you go from Older black women to a younger white chick?

  4. Mexigogue says:

    You were an anomaly. I was only at the Point After for the karaoke contest. I didn’t know someone was going to actually speak to me.

  5. The "D" says:

    My Man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    You are my idle!

    Those are the good times when you don’t plan anything to happen. It just does!

  6. The "D" says:

    Sorry Mike I did not think it was taking!

  7. Mexigogue says:

    That’s ok Dave. I just said the Lord’s prayer backwards and Monique showed up and granted me a wish. I asked her to delete the accidental extra comments and it was done!

  8. rae says:

    I wasn’t just talking about me Foolio.

  9. Mexigogue says:

    I haven’t been involved with any other white chick in that time frame. I’ve liked other chicks here and there, about a billion of them, but it hasn’t come out to anything. So they don’t count.

  10. The "D" says:

    Foolio that now that is a word I will use this weekend at Leroy’s…………oh my Bad! I mean at the Nuthouse!

  11. rae says:

    Well, then I should feel priveledged?
    or easy?

  12. Mexigogue says:

    When they start calling you ‘Sunday Mornin’, then you should start to worry.

  13. rae says:

    “They” don’t call me.

  14. rae says:

    “They” don’t call me. That worries me.

  15. Mexigogue says:

    Heh heh! Changing the subtitle of the blog is almost as fun as blogging itself!

  16. The "D" says:

    I would call you Rae!

  17. rae says:

    **batting eyelashes**

  18. Mexigogue says:

    I was just covering phones for a coworker. And she had an IM pop up. I”m like heh heh! Man I did about 10 minutes worth of damage pretending to be her! That was fun!

  19. rae says:

    My email is down at work and I’m lost without my Outlook reminders- I can’t remember what I’m supposed to be doing today. I’m assuming that my lunch with our Systems Administrator is cancelled though. HAHA!!

  20. Mexigogue says:

    No more bowling and beer drinking for you. Your presence is required here!

  21. rae says:

    No more beer or bowling? I quit.

  22. Mexigogue says:

    I mean on blog time!! do what you want after 5 p.m. dammit! Until then you’re mine!!!

  23. rae says:

    Ooooh!! I like it when you get all possessive and demanding.

  24. Mexigogue says:

    I’m one of those people you can’t give even a little bit of power to because if you do pretty soon I’m inventing draconian blog rules and IP banning people. Then I’m invading Czechloslovakia and then knocking on Poland’s door. It’s a flaw in my nature.

  25. rae says:

    Keep talking dirty babie!!

  26. Mexigogue says:

    Wir, der deutsche Führer und Reichs-
    kanzler und der britische Premier-
    minister, haben heute eine weitere
    Besprechung gehabt und sind und in
    der Erkenntnis einig, daß die Frage
    der deutsch-englischen Beziehungen
    von allererster Bedeutung für beide
    Länder und für Europa ist!!!

  27. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    That’s the kind of women you should go after, chicks with careers and an education, honey’s with a future. Don’t start a relationship with anybody that hangs out at Leroy’s.

  28. Mexigogue says:

    True dat. Hey, did you like the clean baby reference? inside joke y’all. This ghetto chick we knew was all like I might not have a job or a lot of money and maybe I’m not educated or in school but at least my baby is clean!

    After that every time we saw her we would remark on how clean her baby was.

    Probably because she couldn’t afford dirt.

  29. rae says:

    I hung out at Leroy’s and I have a career and am pursuing my education too. Just because I hung out at Leroy’s doesn’t mean I’m a bad person and just because he meets a chick that DOESN”T hang out at Leroy’s doesn’t mean she’s a good person. Sure the ratio changes when you LEAVE Leroy’s but let’s not make broad generalizations here.

  30. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    I wasn’t making a broad generalization! I was Stereotyping! Chicks at Leroy’s are losers!! Period! Meeting a future significant other at Leroy’s is not going to produce positive results! Those are some evil trifling ghetto chicks hanging out there. None that a sane man would want to take home to mother. I know there are exceptions to every rule even the stay away from Leroy’s chicks rule, and you may be one Rae. But even you aren’t exactly educated now are you? Starting college and being done are with college are two entirely different things. I should know it took me 10 years to get my degree! Your career sounds more like a job since you want to get out of it and start an auto mechanics shop!

  31. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Whoa I just read my last post. It comes off way harsh in a personal attack kind of way! It’s not meant to be a personal attack!!! Sorry big time if that’s how it sounds!!!!

  32. The "D" says:

    UNLV: I finally understand why it is important to only talk to women with something on the ball. The reason I hang at Leroy’s is for the pool table. If I did nothave a girlfriend already I would be at 621 and the Exchange all the time. My friend just bought the Green Door with some of his friends and ran all the drug addicts out. It is a nice place to meet professional women with something going for themselves.

    I work hard to get a Degree and refuse to let a “Chicken Head” with a nice body suck back on my check.

  33. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Chicken heads will ruin your paycheck faster than the gumment!

  34. Mexigogue says:

    Sweeping generalizations are to be used as a guide,not as an absolute statement. Don’t date a guy you met through prison correspondence might have a few exceptions, but it’s a damn good rule. The same stands for the Leroy’s caveat. I concur with UNLV and I also agree with him that his post sounded harsher than I’m sure he meant it. Oh well, we all slip up once in a while. No blood no foul.

  35. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Anybody here watch Chapelle’s show?

  36. The "D" says:

    I never miss an episode! I loved the Real World episode.

  37. rae says:

    Let me address these “attacks” and “apologies”.

    You must love to make assumptions on top of Sterotypes because you soooo don’t know me.

    First off- I am educated. I graduated high school a year ahead of my class. I went to college for two years and majored in Psychology and Education. I then decided to get my Real Estate license and pursue a CAREER in Real Esate. I have several designations on my RE license- ABR (Accreditted Buyer’s Representative), GRI (Graduate Realtor Institute), as well as CRS (Certified Residential Specialist). I have attended many hours of continuing education for both Commercial and Residential real estate since I was licensed nearly 7 years ago.

    I am STARTING my automotive tech school because I’m bored in my Career. I have made really good money over the years but I am not happy. The difference to ME between a Career and a Job is that a job is temporary and a career is permenant. I will always do Real Estate as my career and working on cars will be a job until I can purchase a Commercial Building myself to hold my own garage and a bar/restaurant- and when I get that it will be neither a Job or a Career it will be “Retirement”.

    So, before you pass judgement on me-or anyone else for that matter-learn to ask questions instead of getting so presumptuous. It’ll save you some embarrassment in the long run.

  38. Mexigogue says:

    Nice retort Rae. We also would have accepted “Screw you hippie!” But yours was more thorough.

  39. The "D" says:


  40. Mexigogue says:

    Dave is a regular Ghandi!

  41. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    No embarrasment here, Rae! A high school diploma and 2 years of college does not make an educated person! I’m sorry, it Never has and it never will. It makes you a college drop out! Hell I was one for several years. Let’s see a degree! Youu have potential and it sounds like you are getting ready to use it. But that puts you in the same boat as everybody else at Leroy’s. Your definition of alot of money may vary from mine since you can’t make too much money you have a roomate!

  42. Mexigogue says:

    Hey everbody, look at that shiny stuff over there!

  43. The "D" says:

    Damn UNLV!!! Did she rub you the wrong way? Now let me set the record straight. Both of you have alot of pride and this conversation is going to cause someone not to blog anymore.

    Both of you are smart and intelligent people. I think both of you would succeed in whatever endeavor you pursued. But PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!! Dont make the blog personal. The two of you will not give in so I say No Masse or whatever Duran said when Sugar Ray whooped his ass.

    Let it Rest!!!! I caould not live without hearing from both of you all day. Mexi stop it before they get out of hand!!!

    Oh the Chaos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OOOHHHHNNNNOOOOOOOO!

  44. Mexigogue says:

    I clearly tried to divert their attention to the shiny stuff so as to change the subject.

  45. rae says:

    Geez- you are a class act.

    I didn’t realize I was on trial here.

    My Real Estate License with all the designations are equivalent to a 4 year degree in Real Estate.

    My two years in college left me 12 credits shy of a degree- I guess that makes me a looser huh?

    What truly makes me an educated person is my life experience- besides education is a lifelong process- not just a piece of paper.

    You should be shot for putting me on the same level of everyone at Leroy’s.

    Alot of money to me was a six figure income for 2 years. I bought my first house- in a good neighborhood- for about $145K – when I was 20-years old.

    My roomate is my ex-boyfriend with whom I just broke-up with a week ago after almost 2 years of living together and since it wasn’t a vicious break-up we agreed to be roomates while HE is unemployed- I’m not a total bitch to leave him high and dry.

    So, genius who took ten years for a piece of paper to put on his wall and act holier than though– FUCK OFF!!

  46. Shinystuff says:

    Look at us! look at us!

  47. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    No anger here. Nothing but love for all!!!! Mr Ghandi!!!!!

  48. Mexigogue says:

    Give it up shiny stuff. It’s just not your day.

  49. rae says:

    I will not be intimidated to quit the blog- no matter how rediculous anyone gets. 😉

  50. Mexigogue says:

    That is what we want to hear! It’s like tackle football. YOU can get bruised and end up with a mouthful of blood but in the end it will be Miller Time and it’s all good then.

  51. rae says:

    Oh, and one last thing? Is your degree in bullshit? Just wondered. 😉

  52. Mexigogue says:

    You guys are funny. It’s like having my own personal zoo and I’m like I always wondered what would happen if you put in a lion with a pack of pit bulls, add some hyenas and some Puerto Ricans.


    ohhhhhhhh! so THAT’s what happens!


  53. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Rae,I never said you were an idiot! I said college dropout! I’m far from holy I dodn’t finish school to hang a piece of paper on my wall, I did it because it was something i started! Life experience makes you wise not educated. Education makes you educated not wise!!! My piont was find an educated woman with a career. You would be considered wise with a career not educated.
    Would you seriously date a man you met at Leroy’s? Be honest and not hypothetical. Mexi doesn’t count because you met him at The Point After. Dave doesn’t count either because he has a GF.

  54. rae says:

    It would depend on their personality, their goals, their sense of humor, and many other things. I don’t say to myself “self, you better hang out at the bar in the Ritz Carlton or you won’t be shopping at Neiman Marcus”- I say “Self- your ass better worry about your own paycheck and bills and do what makes you happy”. If I met someone- anywhere- that caught my eye- I wouldn’t hand them a freakin questionarre to see what their social, economic, or political standings were- I’d give them a chance. I don’t pass judgement on people based on what dive bar they picked to hide in.

    The whole educated-wise arguement- very empty. Different people have different definitions as well as perceptions of words. When you learn something- anything- it is a learning experience- a learning experience is an education-I am educated in the Real Estate market in Mid-Michigan, Manhattan, and DC because I learned about it through classes as well as market research. Whether you think I’m wise or educated doesn’t make me loose sleep at night- the people I truly care about see me for who I am- and who I will become- and that’s all that matters in the long run.

    All Mikey really needs- is a good piece of ass that will cook him his dinner, take care of his kids, and not ask “where do you think you are going?”.

  55. Mexigogue says:

    This is working out nicely. See? A good referee has to know when to let them just play the game. Nice job both of you (and you too Ghandi!)

  56. Ghandi for the "D" says:

    I will never leave the Blog!!!!!!!!!!

    Hey did I ever mention that Rae is Fine as Hell!!

  57. Mexigogue says:

    hehe! another name change! Hey if you all are interested Phelps blogged about his Vegas trip. the blog is very very very very long but it’s interesting as hell. I had to read it in chunks.

  58. Ghandi for the "D" says:

    My father told me m,any years ago that you don’t marry for looks you marry for security. That really messed me up mentally. In a way he was putting my mother down and I wanted to whoop his ass!

  59. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    You thought your mother was hot?

  60. Mexigogue says:

    My grandma was stacked like Mrs. Butterworths. PANCAKES BABY WOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

  61. TB says:

    holy shit….. that story… evny is all I can muster…

    what a bastard you are…

    pete’s dragon, football, and fucking…

    you win.

  62. Phelps says:

    Speaking of beer and bowling, the recap was:

    I bowled like shit
    We won all four
    I had one Shiner Blonde

    And I never liked Mrs. Buttersworth. She called me a honkey ofay when no one was around one day.