Blank Out

We have some people over here that need to just go drive around in the fog. Freaking people never cease to amaze me! We begin today with a huge crisis because an all important document that someone had one disk can’t be opened because it has been corrupted. What can be done? “Once those things are corrupted”, I say, “they’re pretty much screwed. Where’s the original document?”

“That’s the only one we had.”

Great God Amighty.

I’ve been telling people for years not to use floppies as your prime storage option. Floppies are to be avoided because they’re the most likely to go belly up. Put your important stuff on the network drive because that gets backed up periodically and if your document dies the network people can retrieve an earlier version from the archives.

“But I’ve always done it this way and it’s never been a problem!”

You know what? Good luck!

Well the day has finally arrived that the unthinkable has happened. Your all important document went corrupt and you frenzy around with gnashing teeth and furrowed brow because your “never been a problem before” streak has finally come to an end. Who could have possibly foreseen this? Where was my warning?

I warned you mutliple times both verbally and also in the 1999 Prevention Unit Monthly news letter! I wrote a hypothetical letter from a person asking what could be done with a corrupt document on a floppy disk and my response began with “What, did your thinking cap burn up in a fire?” Oh you laughed at that article all right but you went on doing stuff the wrong way because that was the way you were used to. Now you look to me for help and I ought to get The Congressional Medal of Honor for refraining from a much deserved “I told you so!” All I can do now is tell you politely that you’re screwed and wish you good luck on retyping that gravely important document. So important, in fact, that you only kept one copy of it and that one was on a 3 1/2 inch floppy.

Speaking of the fog accident on 96 yesterday that involved a billion car pileup and two fatalities, I drove in that fog on 96 at lunchtime yesterday. You know how I responded when the fog billowed in and visability was reduced to 20 feet? I slowed waaaay down. Other people said to themselves “Since I can’t see anything I can presume there’s nothing ahead so let me just blaze right through this!” Good thinking. I bet if I go through the wreckage of the first vehicle involved in that accident I’ll find a shitload of 3 1/2 inch floppies.

36 Responses to “Blank Out”

  1. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Settle down Beavis!!!!

  2. Phelps says:

    The last time I used a floppy was in 2001 when I was installing Linux on a machine that was too stupid to boot from a CD.

  3. rae says:

    They deserve to loose the fucking document if they are gonna use a floppy. Serves them right.

  4. Mexigogue says:

    Haha! The accuser in the Michael Jackson case says that Michael was jacking his 3 1/2 inch floppy! And squinching up his eyes as he did it!

  5. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    They don ‘t call him Wacko Jacko for nothing!!!

    My favorite is “Accuser’s younger brother: … He [Jackson] picked up the phone and he started dialing. And I guess somebody picked up and he’s like … ‘We’re having a consensus,’ or something, ‘And we just want to know how big your [female genitalia] is.’ And then he hung up the phone.

    Classic!!!

  6. Mexigogue says:

    Yeah, Michael Jackson doesn’t have a recognizable voice:

    Husband: You look like something’s wrong honey. What is it?

    Wife: Michael Jackson just called and asked me how big my (female genitalia) is!

    Husband: No shit! He said that???

    Wife: Yeah

    Husband: He said (female genitalia)?? How did he say the parenthesis??

    Wife: Just like this: We’re having a consensus. How big is your (female genitalia)??? And then he hung up.

  7. R says:

    What the fuck is a 3 1/2 floppy?

  8. Phelps says:

    Pull the waistband out away from your belly on your Underoos;

    Look down;

    Quickly release your waistband.

  9. The "D" says:

    Classic blog today guys!! I am cracking up!

  10. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    I am getting sick and tired of these conscientious objectior dudes that are coming out of the woodwork when they are about to get deployed to Iraq. I could see if these guys were drafted or conscripted into the military but these are guys that have been to Iraq and reenlisted more than once. If you are a conscientious objectior why in the hell are you in the military in the first place? If these guys are so opposed to war in general then they should change their status as soon as they make up their mind that war sucks and not reenlist or wait until the last minute. What a buch of fucks……

  11. R says:

    I conscientiously object to your derision of their situations! Drink some Pepto Bismol if you’re really getting sick of it, beotch!

  12. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Screw them and their situations!!!! Screw you to A$$ Monkey!!! Get a name with more than one letter!!!

  13. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    R. You got that same article on your blog. Fact is if the guy doesn’t want to go to war then he shouldn’t be in the Army. He shouldn’t have reenlisted!! He is just there to get some benefits and trying for a retirement. Sorry but no fight no bennies and no retirement!!!!!

  14. The "D" says:

    They don’t object to those paychecks they receive each month. I truly believe that some of the soldiers are not of the highest moral fiber. You know damn well they are collecting that check and running around playing army when we are not at war. You have slackers at work so you know there are a few in the military.

    If I was in the service and somebody tried that we would conscientious whoop his ass until he came around. How the hell are you going to go through all that training then turn out to be a damn wuss!! Oh hell now!! I would want all my money that I spent training him and that I paid out to him. That’s like having a body guard that is afraid of large crowds.

  15. The "D" says:

    What’s up with this “R” kid?

    Sounds like a IP ban to me!

  16. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    No Ban on “R” he is alright. Could be a good solid debater….That makes the blog good

  17. Mexigogue says:

    The first time I used the IP ban it was because I wanted to try it, like if I had a grenade and wanted to see what it could do. The second time was because things got really heated between two chicks and I admired the boobs of both of them so I wanted to inflict peace. Then there was one issue Aidan who we tried a lot of patience with.

    The IP ban will not be used to quash dissent. Only to bring warring chicks to peace and boot boring one issue Australians.

  18. R says:

    UNLV, I called you “beotch” in only the most respectful, and, some would say endearing, meaning of the word!

    The dude in question, Benderman, didn’t re-enlist, as far as I read in the article. He just supposedly saw some shit in Iraq that gave him pause; reason to contemplate his morals. Maybe he’d never actually been in a real honest-to-God war before and saw stuff that changed him.

    Can you honestly say that one person remains the same for as long as they live? Experiences do stuff to people; change their perspectives on life. Why shouldn’t he be allowed to re-evaluate his way?

    And if he does get granted conscientious objector status and doesn’t completely get out of the Army, that doesn’t make him bad since there are tons of people in the Army who are never deployed for combat. Does that make them wanna-be soldiers, too?

  19. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    In the Army the only way you are going from Ft. Hood to Ft. Stewart is to reenlist for a differend duty station. The guy is 40 and a Staff Sargent. You don’t get to be 40 years old or a staff Sargent on your initial 4 year enlistment. If he saw some stuff during his initial deployment then he should have called time out. Hell he has had the last year to decide that he is a conscientious objector. You don’t trian with a unit and then at the last screw some replacement by chickening out. during his last 18 months of being stateside then he should have said something when he came back! In the Army everybody is considered deployable, unless you are physically unable to do your duty then you are either rehabed or given your walking papers. I don’t know anybody serving in the military who says he guys I’ll join as long as I get to serve where I want to and do what I want to. That is a fundamental breakdown of discipline and dishonorable to himself and his family. If you sign the contract then honor it! This guy should go to jail for a year or two and then be discharged with no VA or retierment benefits.

  20. rae says:

    Booooooooooo if boobs can get banned then certainly the letter R can. Did he write the episode from Sesame Street? The one that said “brought to you by the letter R”

  21. R says:

    Don’t be jealous just cuz I wrote an episode of Sesame Street. That shit is iconic.

  22. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    He and his partner the number 5 sponsored alot of Sesame street episodes back in the day!!

  23. rae says:

    UNLV- since I have dated at least one member of every branch of the military- except the Navy- ewww- I can agree that he should be jailed. It doesn’t matter if he “grew” and his perspective on life changed-he signed a fucking contract and has to deal with the consequences. Umm- I don’t want to pay for my daughter to go to college-in fact my perspective on having children has changed-can you shove her back up my wife’s crotch please?

  24. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    That conscientious objector guy is a freaking mechanic. It’s not like he is going to go out on raids and be kicking ass. True enough he will be in basecamp getting mortared and rocketed and stuff….

  25. The "D" says:

    “R” very goo dpoints. People do change and that does not make them bad. But come on they guy is in the military. Sooner or later you gotta get busy!!!! You cannot reap all the benefits of the military and back out when the heat comes. You let the squad and yourself down.

    Hey I use to have a thing for Maria on Sesame Street. I truly think I was suppose to be Mexican not black. Why did God do this to me. I can do nothing now but watch Caliente and dream!!!! Dammit my skin!!!

  26. R says:

    “…he signed a fucking contract and has to deal with the consequences.”

    True enough. And he is. In fact, I’m pretty sure that contract spells out consequences for breaking said contract, so everything is going according to Army rules and regulations.

  27. Phelps says:

    since I have dated at least one member of every branch of the military

    Way to go! Everyone give it up for Rae!

  28. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    Maria was/is Puerto Rican and you back off “D” she is mine!!!

  29. R says:

    “Maria was/is Puerto Rican”

    Yeah, but she wanted to be Mexican.

  30. guy in the UNLV jacket says:

    You stay away from her too. She is mine…..She wants to wear a UNLV jacket….A Red Satin one

  31. Mexigogue says:

    Y’all need to go rent “Black and White and Red All Over”. It’s a story about this clique of young black friends doing some positive things and some negative things, just going through life. AT one point they get high and start talking about Sesame Street. The one says “There wasn’t no fiine muppet on Sesame Street. They were all funny looking.”

    The other one says “Yes there was.”

    “Who?”

    “Daaaamn. . . um. . . um.. what’s her name? Maria!”

    “Man. . . Maria wasn’t no damn muppet!”

    “I know, but she was fine then a motherfucker HAHA!”

  32. Phelps says:

    You know what kids TV chick I was always hot for? Christine on You Can’t Do That on Television. Big moon faced Amazon chick. Covered in slime. When you’re 12 and she’s like… 19, that’s as hot as it gets. (There are hotter things, but you can’t tell the difference because you’re already redlined.)

  33. Mexigogue says:

    NO WAY!!! NOT YOU TOO! I THOUGHT THAT WAS JUST ME!!!! I was a little too old to watch the show but my younger brother would have it on so I noticed her.

  34. Phelps says:

    NO WAY!!! I THOUGHT THAT YOU WERE ME!!!

    I keep looking around trying to find a copy of Fight Club in the two disk Special Edition but everyone wants like $30 for it (used) and I’m not ready to pay that. I want to buy a straight razor first.

  35. rae says:

    Damn- missed the fighting yesterday. LOL

    “since I have dated at least one member of every branch of the military
    Way to go! Everyone give it up for Rae!”

    Thanks hun! 😉

  36. The "D" says:

    Rae I am in the Navy!! Well the Detroit Navy!