Quote List

I was going to put together a list of “People I Admire and Would Like to Emulate” but I realize that this is all BS because people will often say something like “I admire and want to be like Jesus” and then they’ll go on a rampage knocking out 10 people in a bar brawl or something. And to tell you the truth I don’t want to be like anybody else but there are people I will reference from time to time, especially historical figures so instead I will put together a list of people I often quote:

1. Malcolm X

Gotta go with this first. When questioned after some atrocity committed against black people how he would advise his followers to respond, he said “If my child gets bitten by a snake I’m going to go out and kill the first snake I find. I’m not going to check its fangs for blood first.” A reporter pounced “Then you’re advocating indiscriminate retaliation against white people?” He said “No, I’m just talking about snakes.”

2. Ayn Rand

Ok, I’m usually quoting the characters in her novel “Atlas Shrugged” but you’d have to read it to understand that to quote them is to quote her. Here is a philosophy that is nonviolent (except in self defense), advocates dealing with people on the basis of mutual consent and free will, and doesn’t involve indiscriminate retaliation against snakes or white people.

3. Bruce Lee

You would be surprised at how deep this dude his. He read all the great philosophers and he’s got it down to a worldview.

4. Adolph Hitler

Hey, this isn’t a list of history’s ten nicest people. It’s a list of the ten most quotable, and this guy ranks up there. Especially if you can quote him to match your opponent’s view. Use sparingly however. Comparing people to Hitler is vastly overdone and Stalin doesn’t get his fair share of credit for killing millions of people.

5. Richard Pryor

No explanation required

6. Chris Rock.
7. Obe Wan Kobe

Can you picture Kobe’s teammate Luke Walton complaining that he can’t get his girl to go all the way and Kobe standing there in a Jedi outfit going “Use Force Luke.” Ok, Kobe didn’t really say this but it would have been funny.

8. Muhammad
9. Sun Tzu
10. Willie Peters

Others of note: Thomas Jefferson, George Jefferson, Stewie from “The Family Guy” and Homer (Simpson, not the ancient guy)

24 Responses to “Quote List”

  1. Phelps says:

    I like quoting rap and rock and roll, too. The more inane the better. In fact, I just changed my tagline right before I read this.

  2. THE "D" says:

    There have been some really good quotes from all these people. It is funny how you can apply them to your everyday life all the time.

  3. The Sicilian says:

    Stewie kicks ass!

    By the way…you cheated on the contest, but I never said you couldn’t!

  4. Mexigogue says:

    Haha! I was just trying to be a smartass by answering the name of the .jpg. I didn’t know it was gonna be named what it really was.

    And yes, Stewie is awesome.

    As for the rest of you, me and Lauri got some fabulous bargains at the shoe sales yesterday!! wooooo eeeeeeeee!! I’m exhausted!

  5. Nice Rack says:

    The shoe stores were fabulous, Mike bought the cutest pair of clogs. I will admit that the last person on your list is quotable, but of all the people from the spot, I think the one person who gets quoted the most would have to be Gaylord. When he walks in the door, at least 10 people say his infamous line. I don’t believe I have ever intentionally quoted an intellectual in my speech, but Mike is really good at quoting Coming to America.

  6. Mexigogue says:

    Lauri bought berkenstocks and then we went to a lesbian wedding, went on a hayride with some miscellaneous hippies and we ended by up hugging trees and eating tofu-jerky! Love peace and hairgrease!!!

  7. No, you went to the bar and and played a new game Ken invented called “Bank the Red ball.” And you spent all your quarters because you kept losing, jackass!

  8. Nice Rack says:

    Besides, we all know that I would never wear Birkenstock’s, because I do not participate in muff love. Mike did keep asking me to hug his tree though, which I found a tad bit peculiar. Do you think the red ball is symbolic for anything is Ken’s life? I mean, why the red ball? I think Dave would hate that game.

  9. THE "D" says:

    Okay Mike the buying shoes thing is kinda strange — even if she has a nice rack!!!!

    I could have sworn I saw the two of you in Victoria’s Secret lastnight. HUMMMMMMMMMM!!

  10. Nice Rack says:

    Mike was trying on thongs, I just wanted to watch and laugh. Don’t look the next time he bends over to take a shot, you might see his panties.

  11. THE "D" says:

    Now that was funny as hell!!!!!!!!!!

    Viva LaBlog!

  12. Nice Rack says:

    I think Mike is getting mad at me, there has been no response. Just remember that Mike may do odd things, but he is only doing it in the hopes of one day getting laid by me (or at least be able to touch one of my boobs.)

  13. Mexigogue says:

    I already touched your boobs that time you fell asleep over Monique’s house so there!

    (no, not really but I had to have a retort of some kind, and I’m not mad, I was installing software at another workstation)

    (( bitch! ))

    ((( just kidding )))

  14. Mexigogue says:

    And a really messed up game would be bank the blueball!

  15. Nice Rack says:

    That game would be fitting for me, since I give those quite often. I hope the installation was a good time.

  16. Sir Courvoisier says:

    I am in a f…..ed up situation. I am supposed ot go to the D’backs game tonight with a married friend of mine and his mistress. I am all cool with banging some chicks on the side if that is what you have to do, but taking them out in public with your friends is not cool. My problem is that his wife is real cool and actually hotter than the mistress. Not to mention that his wife and my wife are friends. What should I do

    signed the hypocrite

  17. Mexigogue says:

    Hey, I just noticed you said I was wearing panties. You’ve got the wrong Mike. That’s Mike “panty-man” Ryan!

    (and he’s got the blog address too however I dont’ think he ever uses it, we’ll see if we can smoke him out)

  18. Mexigogue says:

    Damn Sir Cour. . ., I wouldn’t take a mistress out in public either. . . unless I was secretly hoping to end my marriage with a scandal. The decent thing to do is to creep and lie about it. Seriously. I’m not being sarcastic. The game has rules.

  19. The Sicilian says:

    I come back and there’s mistresses and games and fun stuff going on here…Damn work to hell.

  20. THE "D" says:

    Don’t do it Sir! If you go it is kinda putting yourself out there that it is okay to cheat and let other spouses know. That can come back and bite you. Now if you wife is not going I would not worry about it. Just make sure the mistress does not have big boobs and wears a shirt saying something like — “WANT MILK” “YOU CAN TOUCH THIS” or “JUST A SQUEEZE WOULD DO” on it.

    That way the TV cameras will not do any close ups and bust both of you.

  21. THE "D" says:

    Bust — now that was a play on words right there.

  22. Sir Courvoisier says:

    It gets worse…My boy’s chick is a personal trainer with a smoking hot body and an ok, not great face. He just called and told me that one of her hot personal trainer friends is coming to the game with us. This is fucked!!! He is trying to draw everybody’s favorite cognac down into his den of inequity….The only positive is that my wife in still in Detroit until Friday…..i was trying to chill out here and not turn in to my evil alter ego “Evil Gary”…..

  23. Mexigogue says:

    There are two Garys: Evil Gary, and Evil to the 2nd Power Gary! Don’t mind it. I’m not a bastion of morality either.

    (the peanut gallery gasps in disbelief)

  24. TB says:

    speaking of Evil Garys….. there was a guy I ran into who was wearing a unicorn head and holding a bass guitar. I asked what his name was and he said “Gary”

    that’s pretty fucken evil.