The Fittest Survive

Once again it seems that the conservationists’ cries of alarm have been premature. CNN reports a new finding of the existence of an estimated 125,000 gorillas living in the equatorial Africa. This by itself outnumbers the 1980s estimate that said there were only 100,000 of the apes left worldwide. The resurgence of the numbers should only be a surprise to anyone who believes that nature is static rather than dynamic. As Charles Darwin postulated many years ago, when a species is decimated due to outside forces, it is inevitable that the weak will be curried from the population leaving only the strongest to reproduce and pass on their genes.

In the case of the world’s gorillas, the two biggest causes of their decline have been the destruction of their natural habitat and poaching by hunters. It is no surprise then that the remaining gorillas in the Congo have begun to evolve a natural resistance to poaching. You can put them in a boiling water with a little bit of vinegar and they don’t even cook. Also, the apes in question have been seen in the area living in huts, riding horses, and throwing nets over stranded astronauts, and in one salient instance, Charlton Heston. Let us not fret over these developments. The war against our larger furry cousins is on. Take heart that we have at least a few hundred thousands years head start on them.

Oh yeah, just to be on the safe side, somebody go and bury the Statue of Liberty.

3 Responses to “The Fittest Survive”

  1. R says:

    Hahahahahahaa!

  2. Phelps says:

    We must not allow an ape gap to occur between America and Africa. We need to develop alternative apes and end our dependence on foreign gorillas. We can’t poach our way out of this problem.

  3. Perhaps if the poachers first stunned the apes with tranquilizers, then marinaded them in something tasty, like Italian dressing, before boiling them, perhaps then they would cook properly. Vinegar is tasty on fries. Gorillas? Not so much.

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