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February 2008

The Great Toilet Seat Debate

Guy in a UNLV Jacket asks: My wife wants me to put the toilet seat down when I am done pissing and I always forget am I going to go to hell? My answer is yes, Guy in a UNLV Jacket you ARE going to hell, but it has nothing to do with the toilet […]

The Ask Mexi Column

I am absolutely incapable of giving relationship advice. I’m horrible at reading people and I’m even worse at divining their intentions in interpersonal relationships. Accordingly, I am now starting the “Ask Mexi” column, where I invite you to email me your requests for relationship advice. Give me the situation with full details and I’ll give […]


There was a twinge of sadness yesterday as I left the guild that I created, Poor Righteous Teachers, and turned it over to my brother (I don’t think any of the members other than my brother know that I named the guild after a rap group). I have hitherto generally quested alone but I knew […]


I really need to get some sleep. Instead of getting some much needed ZZZs b4 a night of pool shooting I was doing this.

From the Russ Martin Show

Russ talking about a chick he dated with flabby breasts. Regarding her taking her bra off: “You ever see a parachute open up?” and; “It’s like when you were a kid you busted a thermometer it’s like picking up mercury with your fingers, same thing trying to push her boobs together.”


Shaq’s first game in the Phoenix lineup is today. I think he’s going to do well with the Suns because, with all of Phoenix’s offensive firepower, opposing defenses cannot focus on him. I would only play him about 20 minutes a game though. Otherwise he will slow the team down. My prediction, Shaq has 15 […]


The Michigan State basketball team has lost two games in the past week and U of M has won twice. What’s next, Brittney Spears gonna deliver the next Messiah?

Useless Pageantry

When people are horribly murdered, candlelight vigils fix everything because. . . ???? Or, to frame the formula better, in the event of terrible crime: 1) candlelight vigil 2) ???????? 3) $$ profit!!! $$ I’ll never understand people.

Absolute Values

Tell the truth, who would you rather work for, who would you rather have as the leader of your office, department, division, or whatever? Hillary Clinton or Barack Obama? That’s what I thought. The thing that makes Hillary Clinton ultimately unelectable is her persona. She doesn’t come across with any of that Bill Clinton charisma […]

Ethical Question

Is it worse to: a) think of your wife’s sister while having sex with your wife, or; b) think of your own wife while having sex with her sister, or; c) dinging the car next to you at the supermarket and then taking off without leaving a note?